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David hugged her ecstatically. "My God, what a performance!" he burst out backstage.
"You're going to get the Tony for this!"
"Some performance." She laughed halfheartedly. "I'm a pregnant lady playing a pregnant lady.
That isn't even acting."
"What you're doing out there is," he corrected, his dark eyes sympathetic. "I'm so proud of
you, Bett."
She beamed. "Thanks. The show must go on, and all that," she added, although her heart was
breaking into pieces inside.
"Doing okay?" Dick called, rubbing his bald head.
"Fine!" she called back, and he nodded and turned away.
She glared up at David. "Does he... ?"
He grimaced. "Well, I was afraid he might push too hard, and that you'd let him. I know it
wasn't my place, but dammit, somebody's got to look after you. Cul won't, damn him!"
She could have seconded that, but it made her feel odd, to have Dick know. Inevitably he'd let it
slip, and then everybody would know. But she couldn't quit the play now. She needed the money
too much.
"David, you're sweet, but..."
"Yes, I know." He bent and kissed her cheek. "I'll talk to you later."
He rushed off as she let the dresser put her quickly into a different, more definite maternity
dress.
It was a long evening, and she tired more easily than she'd expected to. But the thought of
Edward McCullough sitting out there in harsh judgment of her was enough to keep her on her
feet even though she felt like lying down on the stage. She'd show him. His opinion of her didn't
matter one bit! If he could believe she'd betray him with another man, he didn't have an ounce
of trust in her. And that meant that he couldn't love her. Love was trusting, right down to the
death.
She felt as if she'd been utterly used. But the baby was the one thing about their relationship
that she couldn't regret. Even the prospect of raising it alone
didn't bother her; she knew she'd manage. Cul was too frozen up to love anyone, but the baby
would let her love it. She felt tears welling in her eyes. Why wouldn't Cul believe her? Why
couldn't he let himself believe in miracles? Obviously he wasn't sterile, or how could she be
pregnant? But perhaps he'd tortured himself with the thought for too long to let go of it. Like a
bad habit, he couldn't break it.
Maybe someday he'd come to his senses, she thought. But by then, it would be too late. And
there was the black possibility that he'd always believe the baby was David's, even if it grew up
blond and green-eyed.
By and large, people believed what suited them. And being a father obviously didn't suit Cul,
because he couldn't face the possibility that she was telling the truth.
When the final curtain went down, she was utterly exhausted and ready to drop. But she walked
out to thunderous applause and was pelted with long-stemmed red and yellow and white roses,
and bouquets of them were carried onstage. Tears ran down her cheeks as the opening
performance ended triumphantly. Her career was made. The money would come. Her financial
worries were over. But her personal ones were just beginning.
Backstage in her dressing room, she took off her makeup and dressed in slacks and a pullover
blouse before people managed to break in and start congratulating her. She took it all with
breathless enthusiasm, feeling unexpectedly buoyed up and adored.
It wasn't until Cul showed up with a devastating blonde in tow that the bubble broke. And David
wasn't around to catch her this time.
"You were just wonderful, dear," the blonde said from her exquisite mask, clinging to Cul's
arm. "I wanted to be an actress, you know, but mother wouldn't hear of it," she added on a
carefully sad sigh. "I did enjoy your interpretation of the role. Cul said you were a good actress,
but I have to be shown. Of course, I was. I truly was."
"Thank you," Bett said politely, wondering what the blonde would say if she told her about the
baby and who its father was.
"Now we really must go," the blonde told Cul, "if we're going to make it to Nassau tonight.
Cul's spending a few weeks with us while he works on that Hollywood thing, aren't you, darling?
Not that I expect him to do much work around me," she added suggestively.
"Keep the quality up, Bett," Cul said with careless praise. "You were extremely good tonight.'
"Don't bother your head about me, darling," Bett said with sarcastic emphasis, "I'm a
survivor."
He glared at her. "Yes, I found that out, didn't I?"
She only smiled. "I'll see that you get an invitation to the wedding,"
she said, lying deliberately because he was killing her and she wanted to hurt him just as badly.
But there was no reaction at all. He lifted his eyebrows. "Do that. I might be able to make it.
Ready, Tammy?"
The blonde started to say something, but he pushed her gently out the door. "Not now, darling,"
he murmured on a laugh. "So long, Bett."
And just that quickly he was gone. She sat down. Cherrie. Tammy. So that was what Cul's
women usually looked like. Exquisite and wealthy and cultured. Everything that Bett wasn't.
She felt the tears come with a sense of desolate finality.
She grabbed her coat and ducked through the well-wishers, rushing until she reached the stage
door. She thought she heard David call to her, but she ignored him. Her mind had been crushed
by Cul's behavior, by his deliberate mocking of her condition, and by the fact that he'd brought
that woman with him.
She wasn't even aware of where she was going. She didn't know or care that it was dark and
cold, and she found herself heading for the river.
She walked for a long time, keeping her pace brisk, oblivious to the danger. She felt her feet go
numb with every step, and in her mind Cul's voice kept repeating, "I'm sterile____I'm
sterile____The baby isn't
mine____"
Around her, the sound of traffic sounded unreal. Her eyes noticed the lights without really
seeing them. She'd found the river, and she was so numb with pain and hopelessness that she
didn't even think about the baby she was carrying. She stared down at the black water,
wondering if there was any peace to be found there.
In a moment of insanity, she started to jump. "Bett! No!"
The wrenched agony in that voice stopped her. She blinked, turning, to see David running
toward her furiously.
"David?" she mouthed.
He had her. He dragged her into his thin arms and held her, trembling with reaction.
"You fool," he choked breathlessly. "You silly little fool!"
Tears ran down her cheeks as she let the emotion overflow and felt, for the first time, the
impact of Cul's rejection.
"He doesn't think it's his baby," she whispered brokenly. "He brought that blond aristocrat to
flaunt at me, and he said.. .he said... I was a tramp!"
"And you know it isn't true," he told her, holding her closer. "You crazy little girl, didn't you
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